Perspective!

I am in a much better place than I was a few days ago. I am learning to process these emotions and thoughts much more quickly. What I am learning to do the most is set my eyes on Jesus and keep them there.

I took my eyes off of Him and His plan, gave Satan a footstool, and WAM...I allowed my feelings to overtake my knowledge of truth.

I may not agree with Jesus and His ways, but I know that He makes ALL things work together for my good!

Someday I will share my entire testimony here for you all. Now, is not really the time.

Having said that, the things that have occurred in my life are all pieces of my puzzle. Some are sharp and jagged. Some are smooth. Some are bumpy, but they are all fitting into a puzzle that is the story of my life that has led me to a deeper relationship with Jesus.

Jesus is my rock, savior, fortress, and the ONLY one who can comfort me in the time of pain.

I can look at the bigger perspective during the storm and see that Jesus is working, but I am SO human and I wail and cry and lash out. I don't understand why He does these things. Why He allows these events to occur.

BUT...

What I do know is THIS...

My God, MY Jesus, MY friend, MY Father....LOVES me.

He loves LILAH...much, MUCH more.

In those times of sadness I have a hard time wrapping my head around the truth, but once I immerse myself in the word and PRAISE music...I feel HIM hold me.

The tears just fall down my face. I allow HIM to take the hurt, the pain, the questions, the fear, the doubt, the anger, the pride, envy...ALL of it...

And when I do...

I. AM. AT. PEACE!

So, here I go...

To serve and worship my Lord and be surrounded by fellow believers who will allow me to cry, laugh, and be me...

and they LOVE my girl...and my family and they help me to praise...

even in the midst of all the storms.