Many changes are happening in my home.
Some of them are pretty raw and painful, but others have been a beautiful blessing.
I am only going to share the blessing right now. I will continue to be as open and transparent with you all about my walk with Christ, but the other things I must discern not to share at the present time.
Lilah has blossomed like never before.
Just this morning as I was laying in my bed reading Jeremiah 29:12-14, I had been praying God would help me give Him complete control over all in my life. I prayed that I wanted to be obedient to Him first in ALL I do. A HUGE sense of peace washed over me as I heard Lilah's sweet voice on the monitor, "up abo da worl." My sweet little miracle was singing Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star to herself. It was as if God said, "Katie, I am above this world. I see it all. I have this all in MY grip. Trust me."
So, I prayed. Again. For Jesus to help me to trust Him even when I cannot see what His path and plans are.
As I walked down the hall to Lilah's room, Eli asked if he could go "wake her up." I said, "Sure, buddy."
I walked into Lilah's room, sat on her bed where Eli was snuggling sweetly with her. I said, "Lilah, say hi to Eli."
And that beautiful miracle, turned her head to her brother, opened her mouth and said, "Hiiii E I"
My eyes filled with tears.
Lilah loves her protective, supportive, courageous, hero brother SO much.
She trusts him. She knows he loves her.
You know, I must do that with Jesus.
I MUST trust Him.
I cannot control how other people behave, react, respond, but I CAN choose to lay my life in HIS hands and ask HIM to open the windows that HE wants...and close the doors to pathways that lead far away from His purpose.
Obedience to Christ, in all areas of our lives, means that we follow Him even when we don't want to. Satan will try to tempt us with anything to keep us from Jesus. He will use people, things, money, greed, power...ANYTHING. We can be tricked to believing that the blessing is from Jesus if our feet aren't FIRMLY on God. We only learn to decipher the TRUTH when we spend time with God each day. We GROW in Jesus when we read, study, ask, and choose to follow HIM fully.
We must lay down our OLD ways. Lay them down each and EVERY day. We must ask Jesus to give us the strength to NEVER pick that old habit back up. When we do this, when we make the conscious choice to live differently, love differently, stop worrying about what everyone else thinks, and focus all of our life work to glorifying God first...BLESSINGS come.
Many of you may feel that blessings are financial because that is your love language or that is how you see a blessing. But, our idea of a blessing is NOT God's idea.
MY blessings have NOT been financial as of late.
MY blessings have come in lots of tears, BUT also in improvements in Lilah globally, my children's behavior, their trust in me, their confiding in me like never before, their understanding that life is not what we WANT it, but what we make of it.
I feel VERY blessed right now. Even in the thick of a MASSIVE storm.
I choose to smile and laugh each day. I choose to see Jesus in my kids faces. I choose to have FUN. I choose to dance in the rain and allow myself to be who I am...a princess of the King.
Changes can be gifts....if we choose to see them that way.