MRI results...

On Friday, 12/18/09, Alex's 7th Birthday...

Many prayers were answered!

First...God answered my prayer and I was able to help another Mom...read post below!

THEN... Dr. Moretz called as we were all leaving Alex's Christmas Party at school.

She said, "Hi this is Dr. Moretz calling with the MRI results."

I looked at Aaron and gave him the "please keep the kids quiet so I can hear look."

She told me that first she wanted me to know that she thought things looked good, but the results came back with two notes.

First was a "problem with her ventricles" but Dr. Moretz said that she and the 2 other neurologists reviewed the scan and find it to be "technician error."

She said that the other finding was "an abnormally thin Corpus Callosum." She said I have seen these before and I want you to know that I don't think you have anything to worry about...

"Everything looks NORMAL to me!"

I LOST it!

I cried...and cried...and cried!

I told Dr. Moretz that this had been a VERY long year and that today was my oldest daughter's 7th birthday, and that having a child with special needs, especially a Visual Impairment so rare as Peters Anomaly and Sclerocornea, was a very lonely existence. I told her that I NEEDED this good news. I needed a Christmas miracle and THIS was the BEST gift I could have EVER asked for!

She said, "Have a VERY Merry Christmas!"

I hung up the phone and heard Alex ask, "Mommy ,why are you crying?"

I couldn't speak.

Again Alex asked, "Mommy, are they sad tears or happy tears?"

I said, "Alex...these are very, very, very Happy tears. Do you remember how Lilah had a test to see if her brain was okay?"

Alex said, "yes."

"The doctor just called and said that Lilah's brain is just fine." I said

Then Alex asked, "So God said she's okay and her brain is fine?'

I started to cry more and said, "yes, baby. God said her brain is fine."

I have told you all before, but I need you to really understand how VERY much Alex, Sammie, and Eli LOVE their baby sister. They pray for Lilah at EACH and EVERY meal and before bed EVERY night.

God has given us all a great gift...

Christmas came early for the Sharp Six!

THANK YOU GOD!

GOD works in AMAZING ways....

She found my blog....She found me on Facebook.....I am CRYING right now!!!!! TEARS of JOY for you Kristin. I am SO glad I could help you. God put me here to serve. Lilah has helped more people than we know. I cannot see through my TEARS right now...


Kristin's Status UPDATE from Facebook after seeing Dr. Lee for the FIRST time:



"YES!!! I have found a doctor that knows as much or more than me about Peters Anomaly!! He wants to keep her on the drops for a few more weeks because she has only been on her new drop Lotemax for a month. Because Coraline has vision in her left eye we don't want to rush surgery.

Now I didn't learn that much that I didn't know, but I trust this doctor and that's something I didn't have before with her last Corneal Specialist. So I'm happy and we will be back in Atlanta on Jan. 22 and on that appointment he will be able to tell us if he feels surgery is best. I'm trusting God and am thankful for my friend Katie and her blog that has helped me learn so much about Peters and Dr. Lee!!!"

Kristin,

God did this. NOT ME! HE knew what He was doing by placing Lilah with me. HE made me. HE knows that I am loud, a fighter, and NOT scared to tell it like it is. He knew That I would go to the ends of the earth for Lilah and that I LOVE helping and serving others. My goal in this life is to serve Christ. If helping you and Coraline find Dr. Lee is serving God, than I have done my job. I am HONORED and VERY emotional right now. I have such tears of joy for you! I cannot tell you how lonely and overly emotional I have been this past year with Lilah's condition. I am GRATEFUL that God has used Lilah, and me, in such a way. I am BEYOND blessed to be able to help you. KNOW. PLEASE know that I am SO touched that I could help. God works in the most AMAZING ways. I am ALWAYS here Kristin. ALWAYS! YOU will NEVER feel alone in this. NEVER. I may not be able to hug you physically, but I will hold your hand emotionally and walk with you as we battle this together! Thank God for the Internet and for allowing me to help you!

Katie

Did I mention she drove from Louisiana to see Dr. Lee in Georgia?

SEVEN!

Seven years ago today I became a Mother. So much changed that day. My world, my life, me...it all!

After 18 hours of labor, 3 and a half hours pushing, 3 and a half weeks early...

Alexandria Grace Sharp was born at 12:18pm on 12/18/02.

(not planned. After 3.5hrs pushing and a vacuum assist I didn't care about time)

Alex is my mini-me!

I could NOT ask for a better daughter.

• kind
• loving
• helpful
• teachable
• obedient
• thoughtful
• compassionate
• prayerful
• organized
• specific
• a tad picky, but a GREAT thing!
• honor roll student
• accelerated reader(school award)
• hysterical
• exciting
• loves
• needs
• gives
• serves

Happy 7th Birthday to the woman who has made me a better person.

I LOVE YOU ALEX!!!!

So....

I don't want to leave Lilah out...this IS her blog and all...

MRI results soon....

waiting on Dr. Moretz to call!

Gorgeous Gal with her touch light!

Overwhelming FEAR

Today will not be a cute post. Today I have minimal time and am still recovering, but I must put my pain away and face a bigger fear for Lilah today.

Today is the day. I have, quite honestly, DREADED more than I have let on.

Lilah is having her MRI this morning. Brain only with contrast.

Why do I dread it so?

• IV sedation
• TEST
• TRUTH

Did you catch that last one???? Today will reveal the truth about Lilah's brain.

Will is change how I feel for her? NO. NO. NO. Not a chance!!

I will love Lilah no matter the result. It is the truth that we will know if something besides her eyes is "wrong."

Maybe this is it.....

I have been on SUCH a long road with Lilah in a year. UPs, DOWNs, MIRACLES...

I have unwillingly let Satan creep in and control my fear...again.

Today I will pray louder than I have before. Not for God to change Lilah. No way. But, for my peace about whatever the outcome.

Lord,

I am here. I am humbly here. I have a broken body. My mind is all wrapped up in something you beg us not to take hold of. I am fearful today. Will the results of the MRI show that Lilah will be "developmentally delayed?" Lord, I love Lilah. YOU knew exactly what you were doing when you placed her with me. I love you Lord. Thank you for Lilah. She has taught me so much. Lord, I ask for your strength and your peace today. Only you can give me the peace I need to endure the outcome of the MRI. Only you can give me strength to carry Lilah with a broken belly. Lord, I am putting my trust and faith in you and your will for Lilah. You have the plan. I know that Lilah will be alright. If it is your will that something is not "normal" with her brain. I will trust you. I may not understand why, but I will trust you. If it is your will that Lilah has a "normal" functioning brain, than I will praise you even more. I will not stop thanking you for the miracles and gifts you have given me and this family. I am here to serve you with an obedient heart. I will serve you while I'm waiting. Thank you for holding Lilah in your arms and protecting her today. Thank you for holding me while I am weak today. I am grateful. I am trusting. I love you. Thank you!

OUCH!

I am VERY sorry for not blogging in over 19 days.

Life has taken some VERY strange turns in the past 19 days.

I will go back and fill you in on ALL the craziness REALLY soon.

BUT first....

I had an emergency this weekend. With four kids, illnesses are never welcome, timely or easy to take. Wednesday I was diagnosed with two large ovarian cysts. My pain increased, got worse, and intensified on my back.

Well....Friday I was in the ER....they sent me home to sleep in my own bed, with orders to return the next morning for more tests.

To my shock and amazement, I walked into the ER Saturday morning to find out I was having an emergency appendectomy. The nurse was taking my clothes off to put the IV in.(He blew 2 veins next to each other) I had to remind him that I was plenty capable to remove my own clothing!

WOW....it ALL happened SO fast!!!!

Aaron left the kids with our dear friend, Neena, and sped to the hospital to meet me. He got there in just enough time. The CAT scan the night before revealed simple appendicitis, but since my pain was still there and dull, the surgeon didn't want it to rupture.

Before Dr. Flanders did the surgery I asked him if the cysts were obvious would he take care of them. Because he was doing the surgery laproscopically he said no problem.

I gave Aaron a kiss, and was taken back to the OR, where I quickly fell asleep.

Only to be woken with severe abdominal pain and Aaron telling me that Dr. Flanders said the cysts were "HUGE."

Dr. Flanders drained the cysts and he said blood filled my abdomen. So he had to fill my belly with gas and clean my abdomen all out.

I was expecting to go home Saturday night, but my hemoglobin was so low from the blood I lost, that I had to stay over night. I was so worried about Lilah. She still nurses at night to go to sleep.

But gratefully Lilah, and all the kids, did great!

Me.....not so hot

my blown veins from the ER nurse

and I will spare you the photos of the suture that have come out!

So...no rest for this Mama.

Lilah has her MRI in 2 days!

I owe you several posts.....I'm working on it!!!

Cardiologist Visit

Today Lilah was seen by the Pediatric Cardiologist. Lilah, as normal, was amazing. She was patient, calm, understanding, and great during all the testing. She actually smiled during the EKG. Just see for yourself....

After the ECHO, the EKG, and the chest X-Ray the Dr. reviewed everything. He came in the room and told me that Lilah has a Patent Ductus Arteriosus. Her specific case is so minimal, so small, so itty bitty that he said there is nothing to worry about. He said overall she has a normal heart and that the "defect" is very common and NOTHING to worry about. He will re-check her in about 2 years.

THANK GOD!

***Up next......MRI on 12/16/09***

My Miracle is ONE!

Taken 11/25/08

Taken 11/25/09

What a year it has been. Today my emotions are all over the board. Today as I look back at the past year, I am overwhelmed at each moment. The birth, the news, the shock, the grief, the pain, the endless tears, the countless times on my knees in fervent prayer, the anointings, the new friends I have made, the road I have walked, the joy, the happiness, the fight and determination of Lilah, her strength, her courage...HER!



If I had the chance to change it, would I? NO WAY. Not for ALL the money in the world. I wear the pain, the grief, the sadness, and each tear as a badge of honor. Would I change Lilah? No. Would I wish that she was born different? No. Do I wish she could see more, better, etc? In part, yes, but to be honest...I know that God isn't done with her yet. I will not stop believing that He has great plans for her and HE will heal her. He already is. He has given her more than we could have EVER hoped for. She sees my face and smiles. I never thought that would happen, nor did I expect it. I am grateful for everything she is and everything she does. I do not care how long it takes her to crawl, stand, walk, run, jump, climb,etc. She WILL do those things. On her own time. She WILL do MORE than we ever dreamed she would do. She will change the world. She already has. God is guiding her. God is strengthening her. God is, and HAS, changed me so I could help her. So I could help my all of my children.

Today....

I am VERY grateful!

Thank you, Lord, for the birth of Delilah Hope Sharp!

Happy First Birthday Lilah!

I Love you with every fiber of my being.